Melt Down Mickey

Last week I took my family to Orlando, Florida to see Mickey Mouse and also Harry Potter at Universal.  It was a trip that I had been promising my seven year olds for two years.  I was determined to go, by hook or by crook.  Last year there was no way we could afford it.  This year, Chris got a great job, and said we could go.  He didn't go with us.  This was partly because he just got this new job, but I also think that he does not "do" crowds.  It is our belief that he also is on the spectrum in some way.

Mikayla, Mickey Mouse and Michael

So we pack our bags, buy tickets to Disney (1 day) and Universal (2 days get one free), buy plane tickets, make arrangements to rent a car, pay for a week at a vacation house and get ready to go.  I was so excited to give the children an experience of a lifetime.  I also bought plane tickets and theme park tickets for Chris's older children, and son in law to be.  (Technically my step-children, but I feel like they are my own blood anyway)  I knew I could manage this.  I have traveled with the twins alone before.  I had planned for everything down to the last minute.  Planned for everything except the fact I was taking two autistic children to a loud, crowded place that wasn't predictable.

Luckily Michael only had three melt-downs.  Melt-down number one took place after the very first ride we went on, the Harry Potter ride in the castle.  Michael was overwhelmed with this ride, and scared of the dragons and dementors.  He wanted to get away from the castle ride and go on the roller coaster.  We were not very organized and we were waiting for some of the party to use the restrooms.  Then Dale lost his wallet and cell phone, and Amora wanted to go into the gift shop to buy the Harry Potter DVDs.  Michael was frustrated and started yanking on my arm.  He got mad and started hitting me and kicking me.  I got down on his level and said, "Michael I promise we will go to the roller coaster, Dale has lost his wallet....all of his money.  This is very serious buddy."  He then calmed down a bit, but it was getting crowded and noisy.  He then put his fingers in his ears and still had that mad look on his face.

Michael and Sissy at breakfast at the vacation house.

Melt-down number two happened when he was playing in the vacation house pool.  My sister Aimee and her new fiance, Jim, had joined us there.  Jim was fooling around with Michael and pushed him into the pool as a joke.  Michael did not think this was funny and came out of the pool swinging.  He started hitting Jim very hard.  Jim hasn't been around children, much less a high functioning autistic boy.  He really didn't understand.

Michael getting ready to swim

Melt-down number three was at Disney in the Beauty and the Beast castle.  I was trying to order for all six of us and everyone wanted dessert too.  Michael told me, "chocolate cupcake mommy", so I had it in my head that I was ordering three chocolate cupcakes and three strawberry.  At the last minute Michael changed his mind to lemon.  I wasn't paying attention because the place was so crowded.  Michael started screaming and having fits.  We brought him to a quiet room (I still can't believe we found a table in the corner of the most quiet room) and I got down on his level to talk to him quietly and calmly.  He kept screaming, "YOU DON'T LISTEN TO ME, NOBODY LISTENS TO ME!"  I said, "Hey buddy, mommy is listening to you now.  My eyes are looking at your eyes, I am facing you.  I want to hear what you have to say.  I want to help."  I was speaking in a very calm, slow and soft voice.  I was giving him all of my attention.  He said, "Mommy I wanted a lemon cupcake.  I told you and you didn't listen."

Dale, Mikayla, Amora, Matt and Michael

My brain tried to relive the whole waiting in line for an hour to eat lunch, getting everyone's orders, and remembering the whole cash register scenario.  At the beginning of this whole lunch experience he did tell me chocolate.  At the register, I think he did change his mind and ask for lemon.  I was just as overwhelmed as he was.  I finally said, "I'm sorry buddy!  Mommy made a mistake.  I heard you wanted chocolate at the beginning.  When you changed your mind, I wasn't listening to you.  I'm so sorry.  It is mommy's mistake."  He then turned his behavior around and said, "That's ok mommy, I just want to be like Sissy and have the same as hers."  Luckily Amora had ordered a strawberry cupcake, as had I.  I told him, "Michael, Sissy got strawberry, what if you take mommy's strawberry cupcake and then everything will be fine!"  He agreed to this proposal, and any more possibility of a melt-down was averted.

Later on that day, I noticed a mom with a boy who was walking around with headphones on.  I smiled, knowing that her son was probably on the spectrum somewhere.  I then could have kicked myself for not remembering to bring Michael's deadphones.  Maybe some of the melt-downs could have been eliminated.  Yet, overall I think he did very well.  He got back on track quickly.  The melt-downs didn't last too long.  His coping strategies are getting better.  I am actually very proud of him.

One of the days on our vacation, Michael stayed back at the vacation house with me.  I sent the older kids with Amora to use the last day tickets at Universal.  It was important that Michael have some down time.  We went out for ice cream and swam in the vacation house pool.  Michael definitely needed a break from the hordes of people.  I'm glad I went on this vacation and that all of my children got to experience the whole Disney/Universal thing.  Next time, if there is a next time, I will not try to pack so many theme parks into a week.  We will take the time to smell the roses and plan for a more calm, serene vacation.  We will plan it more for our autistic kids, and not just mommy's "dream" of what a vacation should be.