Rules Are Written in Black and White

As most of you know, when it comes to many people with high functioning autism, they think a lot in black and white.  Rules are absolute, and there is very little gray areas, or no gray areas at all.  I have talked about this before in one of my earlier blogs, but it hit home again today as I was taking Michael to swim team practice.
He was just about out of clothes, as I am a bit behind on his basket of laundry.  I went upstairs at 5:40 this morning to wake him up for swim team practice.  He woke up, almost cheerfully and I picked out some clothes for him because he was low on just about everything.  I found his baseball t-shirt, asked him if he wanted to wear jeans or his khaki pants, fished out the last remaining pair of underwear from the very back of his drawer, and told him to get dressed so we could leave for practice.  I walk down the stairs, hear him open his drawer again and shut it.  He comes down with a blue t-shirt that was a bit small on him, his baseball shirt no where to be seen.
We jump in the car and I ask him, "Hey buddy, where is your baseball shirt that mommy picked out for you?"  Michael replies, and deep inside I already knew the answer, "Mommy that shirt is for BASEBALL games, it is not for SWIM practice!"  I answer, "But Michael baseball season is over, you can wear your t-shirt, you can wear your red Philly's t-shirt."
Michael says, "NO mom, I need it for my games, I am going to wear it to my games!"  I explain, "Michael baseball season is over.  There are no more games this summer.  If you join baseball next year you will most likely be on a different team.  Now it is just a red t-shirt that you can wear anytime."
Michael has a slight puzzled look on his face, but seems to accept my explanation.  At the beginning of baseball season, we told  him that the t-shirt was for games, and games only.  He wanted to wear it to practices and just all around wear it.  So now that we set that rule, "The baseball shirt is to be worn only at game time," he still thinks that it can only be worn at game time.
Then we had another "black and white" scenario today.  Coach Margie was really working with the lane 1 kids in swimming practice today.  In order to strengthen the forearm, Margie had the kids swim and "punch forward" in the water making a fist.  Michael had a LOT of trouble with this.  He practically refused to do this exercise.  He told Margie, "I can't make a fist coach, if I make a fist I will punch somebody and beat them up!"  He believes that fists are only for hitting or punching.  It took Margie a long time to convince him that this was just a strengthening exercise.  That this way of punching the water will make him a better swimmer, especially with breaststroke.  Again we see the "inflexible thinking" dominate his thought process.

I remember when Dale, my step-son, was in middle school, and they had the D.A.R.E. program.  Dale was taught that alcohol and drugs were bad.  He never did anything like that, and would never even consider doing drugs or drinking alcohol.  Now he is almost 23 years old, and I mentioned one time if he would like a drink or a beer.  "Oh no MOM, alcohol is really bad.  I can't do that!"  There is no gray area for him.  He will never sit down and have a glass of wine with dinner.  One time he saw me pour a little red wine in some spaghetti sauce, and refused to eat dinner that night.  I had to explain to him later that the alcohol cooked out of the sauce or evaporated and it only left a little flavor.  I'd love to hear from the rest of you who have autistic children or are autistic yourself about times when everything is just black and white.  I'd love to hear your black and white stories, when rules are absolute and the thinking is rigid and inflexible!